Are you Kind to the Girl in the Mirror?


Visualize for a moment… you’re walking past a full length mirror and suddenly you stop and notice something.  What do you see?  Is there one part of your body to which your attention automatically goes?  Now listen.  What is the voice in your head saying?

This is the area I probably struggle with the most.  My head-voice is not kind.  In fact, if I spoke to anyone else on the planet the way I speak to myself, I’m quite sure I’d have no friends at all.  Why do we do that?


We all know that we are more than our reflection.  For me, I know how far I’ve come.  I remember the work it took to shed 65 lbs, and the work it’s taken to keep it off.  But still my critical eye goes straight to my hips and thighs.  I curse myself for doing so much damage to my body.  The voice in my head says I waited too long, that I’ll never look good enough to wear shorts in public.  It says I’m ridiculous to think I’ll ever set foot on stage in a fitness competition.  It’s too late.  I’ll never be good enough, strong enough, pretty enough.  She’s such a bitch.  How do I shut her up?

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First, I pray.  A. Lot.  I pray for the renewing of my mind with words of truth that will drown out the lies of an enemy that seeks to kill, steal and destroy my dreams, my self-confidence, my marriage, my testimony.

Second, I surround myself with uplifting, positive people who understand my struggle.  In fact, the amazing photographer Casey Withers who captured these images of me posted something on Facebook that speaks perfectly to this point…

Everyday I have female clients tell me, “But I have cellulite/stretchmarks.” or “I don’t have abs.”

Here is what else you have:

-Amazing Families
-Incredible Transformation Stories
-Beautiful Children
-Indomitable Determination
-Attainable Goals
-Impeccable Class
-Courageous Journeys
-Nurturing Hearts
-Helpful Posts
-Delicious Recipes
-Your Own Businesses
-Fantastic Careers
-Life Experience
-And On and On

Next time you step in front of a camera, remember that.

You are so much more than your abs or your ass, you are amazing.

You are powerful.



Third, I remind myself that my journey is not over yet.  Every day I work toward being better than the girl I was yesterday… in mind, body and spirit.  My children are watching and I want them to be kind to themselves, so I must model that to the best of my ability.  God created each of us to be unique, weird, special, strong.  He gave us what we need to achieve our best selves.  But we aren’t going to achieve it sitting around staring at our flaws in the mirror.

Focus on those goals and dreams!


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